Now you can cuddle up with the same doll seen dangling from the hand of a Little Sister in the first BioShock 2 teaser trailer. It was made from discarded items found in Rapture, so make sure to update your tetanus shots.
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You will want to keep your shifting short and quick just so you can avoid having to touch this grimy Dollhead Knob Shifter. Of course, if you were a heartless bastard you could probably just decapitate one of your kid’s dolls, rub it in the dirt and achieve the same effect. Either way, I’m amazed that someone actually has the nerve to sell this thing.
Product Page ($25)
Now that the days of the Space Shuttle are pretty much over, all those old Space shuttles have to find a new job. In better times there may have been some excellent opportunities out there, but the best it can scrape up today is a job as a piece bedroom furniture. For all the years it spent transporting millions of dollars of equipment in its payload bay it is now relegated to carrying your graphic novels, skin mags and comic books. A humbling change for the once proud Shuttle.
Product Page ($995)
These Kewpie doll cellphone strap decorations serve no purpose, but will strike the perfect cute/badass balance and give you a pretty good idea of what it would look like if the characters from “Love Is…” decided to open a biker bar.
Product Page: (￥1,500 or about $16 via Tokyomango)
Apparently, this gadget involves shining a light on the palm to determine what kind of businessman you are. So, when multimillion dollar deals are about to be signed, bust this out and ask your new partners to hold out their hands, palms up. That ought to go over well.
(via Tokyomango)
Valentine’s Day is great for those in wonderful relationships, these Grumpy Mini Val Pals are for everyone else. Not only do you have nothing to celebrate on Valentine’s Day, you are outwardly bitter about the whole thing. This doll and its sarcastic remarks will make a great gift for those that are doing nothing for your happiness.
Product Page ($5.95)
As if you needed another sign that society is headed in the wrong direction, take the stupid products people spend their money on. Every year they get stupider and stupider, but we are right there to spend our hard earned dollar. Why? Because poop never stops being funny and it’s hard to resist a “limited edition.” So, without further ado, here is Part I of the epic master list of the stupidest products of 2009.
Just because you have to take time out of your day to clean up in the shower does not mean you need to be any less productive there. Inspiration can strike any time and the Aqua Notes notepad will be sure you have a way to document those million dollar ideas before they are lost in the bowels of your feeble mind. Useful anywhere you need to make notes but where a normal notepad might turn to mush.
Product Page ($9.48)
Instead of having photos of teen idols on their walls, the budding Psychoanalyst will no doubt prefer to stare at this paper doll and imagine what their new house will look like when they hit the jackpot and treat a dream patient like Woody Allen, who’s loaded with both money and personal demons.
Product Page: ($10)
Nothing like having a disembodied baby doll’s head as a decoration in your house. Even better is that it is also a votive holder so that creepy doll head can now have glowing eyes.
Product Page ($18)
