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As promised, here is the sequel to yesterday’s installment of Nerd Approved’s Stupidest Products of 2009. This section concludes the series with categories like Household, Booze, Things That Could Kill You, Alarm Clocks, Lego, USB, Toys and Micellany. Have a great new year!
If your birthday boy or girl needs a little incentive to put some effort into blowing out the candles on their cake, these candles should give them plenty. Sticks of dynamite and little bombs can only be left to burn for so long before something bad could happen. There won’t be any explosion when using these candles, but you are the only one who is really sure about that.
Product Page ($10)
The guest of honor will probably be a bit amused when you bring him a cake with this Dynamite Candle on it. The moment of panic won’t set in until they go to blow it out and it relights. They know it is fake, or are at least 99.9% sure.
Product Page (£2.59, about $4)
Here are the top ten Nerd Approved Gadgets for the week of March 16th-22nd, 2009:
3D FaceStatue: Might be the creepiest product of all-time.
1-900 Hotline: Sexes you up without phone fees.
8 Of The Weirdest St. Patrick’s Day Drinking Vessels: The following drinking vessels may be weird—but they will certainly get the job done.
Flying F#*K Helicopter: A literal “flying fuck”.
Brass Knuckle Bob and Silver Knuckle Sal: Cuddly, mustachioed weaponry.
There have been several versions of dynamite alarm clocks or bomb alarm clocks in the past, but this one is by far the best looking. So good in fact, that it would be highly dangerous to transport it on airplanes or across borders.
Product Page (£15 or $22)
There is one great advantage to giving this to any golfer who tends to “blow up” when his day is not going well. That advantage is that it is not real dynamite. Some people just take the game a little too seriously and those people should not be allowed to possess real explosives.
Product Page (£19.57, about $29)
You may want to be a little careful when you sharpen these pencils, TNT is notoriously unstable. And while there may be no actual dynamite in these pencils, you may get taken to the ground down just for carrying them around. Carrying these around may end up being the best exercise program you were ever on.
Product Page ($1.50)
From Fashionably Geek: On the front: a harmless stopwatch. On the back: dynamite. It gives you something to fantasize about during your next boring business meeting.
Product Page ($40—$44)
If you want to leave your electronics somewhere for safekeeping, Would Stewie be the best person to leave in charge? The dynamite and rockets would make me lean towards no.
They say that with this cradle you will never misplace your hand held electronic device again. Not that I have seen my cellphone disappear after sitting on my dresser to charge, but maybe I am just lucky.
What we really have here is a charging cradle that can be used for cell phones, iPods or any other reasonably sized electronics. The charging cord can be run through the bottom of the cradle while a foam pressure securing mechanism holds it tight. My guess is that means you just jam your device into the foam and it can’t move. Ingenious as all of Stewie’s creations are.
Product Page ($9.99)
Get yourself some “Sweet!” bandages. Very useful for all those people who are as accident prone as Napoleon. Each package contains 15 bandages in three styles with some of Napoleon’s best sayings on it. I would think they would sell these things by the gross, 15 will barely cover a weeks damage.
Product Page ($4.99)
