Yeah, the 19th century may have created literary masterpieces like “The Prince and the Pauper” and “Great Expectations”, but it’s the 21st century that gave them an anal salute by renaming them “The Prince and the Pooper” and “Great Expellations” for use on boxes of fart-obscuring matches. It may seem like a disservice to the authors at first, but let’s be honest, there are a lot of people out there who would have never heard of these books unless they were associated with blowing the buttock bassoon.
Product Page: (Literary Lites $5)
Product Page: (Literary Lites II $5)
From Fashionably Geek: I have two words for you: burrito-vision. That’s right, you will have the power of the burrito—the ability to look at someone and make them fart uncontrollably. Now that’s a superpower.
Also available in brick and sponge versions, which give you the power to…uh, manipulate walls and give sponge baths from a distance?
Click Here For Brick and Sponge Versions
You may have pimped your ride, but the inside still smells like french fries and farts. Pimp the smell with an ocean breeze scent using one of these spinning dubz air fresheners. Just clip it onto a vent and the rims will spin—circulating the smell around the car.
Product Page ($5)
If you want to ensure that your daughter follows a path that starts at spoiled little shit and moves on to egomaniacal bitch who’s totally out of touch with reality, then a good starting point would be getting her this bed which resembles Cinderella’s coach and happens to cost as much as a luxury car. It’ll come in handy later when she uses it to mow down anyone who stands in her way or accuses her of having ever ripped a fart that didn’t delight the senses and turn the air into solid gold.
Product Page: (Starts at $47,000)
Come bask in the glow of this global warming light and get a head start on world geography as it will appear after cow farts and man’s burning of fossil fuels turn the world’s glaciers into 200 extra feet of ocean water. But don’t get too confident, because if it all turns out to be a gigantic crock of shit you may find yourself standing in front of your teacher blaming Al Gore for your inability to recognize any coastal states.
Product Page: ($390)
To some, a bathroom is just a bathroom. To others, it’s a shrine for worship and meditation. If you fall into the latter category, these outhouse and toilet paper string lights will provide soft, comforting light that will work great with the pictures of John Mayer, Kanye West and the cast of the Hills you put above your toilet to spring your bowels into action.
Product Page ($25)
