As you can see, this is not exactly the same sort of Indiana Jones Mola Ram action figure you might find at your local toy store. It isn’t priced like it either. Of course, for $300 you get a super-detailed 28-inch piece of art.
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As if you needed another sign that society is headed in the wrong direction, take the stupid products people spend their money on. Every year they get stupider and stupider, but we are right there to spend our hard earned dollar. Why? Because poop never stops being funny and it’s hard to resist a “limited edition.” So, without further ado, here is Part I of the epic master list of the stupidest products of 2009.
Here are the top ten Nerd Approved Gadgets for the week of October 19th-25th, 2009:
Marvel Comics Slot Machine: Even heroes have vices.
Motorcycle Grip Bottle Opener: Fires up a beer.
Potty Fisher: Another clue you need to change your diet.
Indiana Jones Fridge Action Figure: Commemorate the worst Indiana Jones scene with this action figure.
Super Water Gun Blaster with Cartoon Water Bottle: This squirt gun is a horrifying abomination.
Remember that scene in Kingdom of the Crystal Skull where Indiana Jones survives a nuclear blast by hiding in a fridge? Well now you can commemorate that horrible piece of cinematic history by spending $175 on a 12-inch action figure. A gallery of images is available after the break.
This may just be a paper weight, but it has enough Indiana Jones paraphernalia to keep the most avid fan amused. Every crate has a magnetic whip and fedora as well as a removable lid and rubber snakes. There are three random collections you can receive: the Golden Idol and Well of Souls hieroglyphics Tablet, the Sankara Stones and Holy Grail Cup or the Crystal Skull. No other desk accessory is going to let you play the adventurer like this one.
Product Page ($32.99)
Here are the top ten Nerd Approved Gadgets for the week of July 21st to July 27th 2008:
Wolverine Claw Replicas: Awesome, but it will take a little work to wear them.
Indiana Jones Lamps: Features the fertility Idol and crystal skull.
Pop Quiz Wall Clock: Finally, a practical use for calculus.
Elvis Dream Camera: Take a picture with the king.
Serial Killer Shower Curtain: Sound and motion activated gore!
The next five gadgets are available after the break…
Don’t get me wrong, I love the idea of lamps based on props from the Indiana Jones movies—but the fertility idol version is a bit unnerving. If by some miracle you actually manage to score with a woman in a room where a lamp like this is displayed, don’t be surprised if she comes knocking on your door 9 months later. Think about it.
Product Page: Fertility Idol and Crystal Skull ($18.99 CAD—Japanese import / Available 8/01/2008
This Indiana Jones whip is a shorter version of Indiana Jones’ whip that is soft so that it can be used by kids of pretty much any age. This whip has electronic sound effects that can be turned on to give you Indiana Jones theme music and cracking whip sounds. It is those sound effects that make it a child’s toy rather than a sex toy for adults who are into experimentation but not pain.
Product Page (£17.99, about $36)
The one and only Professor Jones will be your guide as this Crystal Skull projects images of archeological discoveries and famous scenes from the movies onto your wall. Set includes slides with accompanying booklet and an audio CD. Unfortunately, the new movie will probably be on video by the time you can get your hands on it.
Product Page ($39.99—ships in October)
Today is the day my friends! Celebrate the opening of the new movie by decking out your desktop with some fun and useful prop replica desk accessories from the Indiana Jones movie series. The Ark of the Covenant doubles as a business card holder, the Holy Grail with hold your paperclips and the fertility idol will handle your pens. Sacri-licious! Additional product images after the break.
