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As promised, here is the sequel to yesterday’s installment of Nerd Approved’s Stupidest Products of 2009. This section concludes the series with categories like Household, Booze, Things That Could Kill You, Alarm Clocks, Lego, USB, Toys and Micellany. Have a great new year!
As if you needed another sign that society is headed in the wrong direction, take the stupid products people spend their money on. Every year they get stupider and stupider, but we are right there to spend our hard earned dollar. Why? Because poop never stops being funny and it’s hard to resist a “limited edition.” So, without further ado, here is Part I of the epic master list of the stupidest products of 2009.
When motion is detected, this traffic light dog toy will flash red, yellow and green for 30 seconds. Of course, dogs have trouble seeing colors properly, so they are going to barrel through that red light every time.
Product Page ($10)
You have to figure that a sex slave doll is one toy that won’t complain if it is played with a bit roughly. As a matter of fact, the more it is tossed around, the more it will shout out “Oh yeah! Aaaah that’s good!”. As long as your dog doesn’t start coming home in leather and chains I don’t see any harm in it.
Product Page ($13.99)
When they call these liquorice whips, they mean whip in a very real way. Take a couple whacks at your favorite S&M partner with one of these then sit back and enjoy the tasty liquorice flavor. If bondage is more your thing, then check out the gummy handcuffs after the break. Either of these candy sex-game toys will leave you with the best aftertaste you have ever had.
Here are the top ten Nerd Approved Gadgets for the week of April 13th-19th, 2009:
Disk Brake Coasters: For mechanics who like to keep a tidy house.
T-Shirt Radio: Falls a bit short.
Final Fantasy Buster Sword Keychain: Won’t help in a street fight.
The Bacon Skateboard: Allows you to pull off a frontside porkslide.
Mr. Bump Alarm Clock: Responds to physical abuse.
Here are the top ten Nerd Approved Gadgets for the week of April 6th-12th, 2009:
Calf Plush Home Gadget Bag Barrel: Crying calf gadget cup is completely absurd.
Heat Sensitive Monkey: Has a color-changing perm.
Spooky Tumblers: Your booze is haunted.
Giant Star Trek Spock Peel and Stick Wall Graphic: Finally, Leonard Nimoy can creepily stare back at you as you sleep!
DIY Art Car Kits: Add to your car’s hideousness.
Wow, 2008 has been one hell of a year. It was the year we elected our first African American President. The year Michael Phelps won 8 Olympic golds. The year the economy faced near collapse. And, of course, it was the year we discovered a poop frisbee and a Sith Lord Toaster. But, as you will see from the list after the break, that’s not all the crazy crap we found.
There are a lot of activities that are a blast until you wake up the next morning with a nasty rug burn. Let your partner know you are thinking about them by getting them this handy kit for avoiding rug burns. The knee pads and knuckle/toe protectors seem simple enough. The padded backbone strip is where things start getting weird. But it’s the thought that counts in gift giving.
Product Page ($9 AU, about $6 US)
Here are the top ten Nerd Approved Gadgets for the week of December 1st-7th 2008:
DV Style Butane Lighter with LED Flashlight: Palm-sized camcorders, gorgeous women, LEDs and flames.
Magic Apartment Light: A lamp fit for a voyeur.
iBoobs: The softest speakers you could ever want.
“Swallow” Neon Sign: Make a bold and tasteless bedroom statement.
Whack-a-Butt: Just like like Wack-a-Mole…only sexier.
The next five gadgets are available after the break…
