Just because you hate fruit doesn’t mean you can’t find a suitable place for it in your home. You can always impale it with this candle holder and watch it rot away by candlelight while you eat Ding Dongs and Ho-Hos. Then at the very end you can finish it off by yelling “And take your friggin’ vitamins with you!”

Product Page: ($24, currently on sale for $21.60)

This “Ice Ice Kitty” tray can have up to nine ice kittens suckling at her silicone teats at any given time, so you can rest assured that you’ll always have enough cats to keep your glass of swill cold and watered down, just how you like it. Just make sure you keep filling the the tray so she can give birth to another litter of ice babies…Dad.

Product Page: ($11.99)

Our Twitter readers heard it first, but I wanted to let everyone know that Nerd Approved readers can now get 25% off their dick towel purchase using the promo code “dick11.” Just head on over to dicktowel.com to get this wholesome, practical gift for that special someone. And if you haven’t already, make sure to check out the show that brought us all the joy that is towels with dicks—It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. It’s seriously funny.

A dry bird will ruin Thanksgiving. Your mother in law will make some sort of crack about your cooking skills, you’ve had a few so you call her a bitch, and it’s all fists, hair pulling and tears from there on out. One turkey-shaped turkey baster could have avoided everything.

Product Page ($10)

Looks like this elf won’t be able to sneak in and cobble shoes for you at night anymore, but he’s still willing to help. His limbs are detachable and magnetic, so his well dressed gams can hold your Shake n’ Bake coupons and entertain you with hours of Irish fridge jigs. A woman’s legs in dominatrix boots are pictured after the break.

Product Page: (Man $15.95)
Product Page: (Woman $15.95)

Can you explain the populartiy of, or imagine the amount of money Mr. Snowglobe made just by putting white bits in a liquid filled glass ball with some cutesy scene? The eternal question is now asked by the snowglobe itself…WTF?

Product Page: ($12)

Unless you like y0ur coffee cold, pouring a cup of java into this Pac-Man (or “Pac-Boy” as it were) mug will bring on the baddies. So where is Pac-Man on this mug? It seems that your head will be taking on that role my friend.

Product Page ($9)

If you are searching for a perfect gift for that special someone (and by “perfect” I mean “stupid”, and by “special” I also mean “stupid”), check out the short and sweet gift guide I wrote up on Gizmodo. It features seven offbeat gifts and one definite “don’t buy.” If you are looking for even more gift ideas, make sure to check out our “Approved Products.”

Let your love of liquor have a three-way with your love of chess and your love of corporate themed home decor with this Jack Daniel’s chess set. Then prepare yourself for non-stop action when the Daniel family turns on each other in a drunken attempt to gain chess board supremacy.

Product Page: ($197.50)

You already have the Three Wolf Moon shirt (or a variation on it),  so why not add an extra layer of internet meme insulation this winter with the wolf howl moon blanket?

Product Page ($12)