If you are purchasing toys like this Undercover Cat Teaser then it is no wonder that your cat hates you. The supposed mouse under the sheet moves randomly with just his tail sticking out. The ability for the cat to get exercise is one of its selling points, but I am not sure sacrificing his sanity in order to tone his flabby legs and provide you with simple entertainment is a proper trade off.

Product Page ($29.95)

This 12-inch tall Alice In Wonderland Mad Hatter figure is insanely detailed, insanely dressed and insanely expensive at $200.

Product Page ($200/Pre-Order for April 2010)

Created under the direct supervision of AKIRA creator Katsuhiro Otomo, this Kaneda die-cast bike replica measures 6.3″ H x 19.7″ W and features LED illumination on the front and back wheels, headlights, taillights, blinker, and dashboard. It also includes sound effects, adjustable headlights, a front end that can be raised and lowered and a full, workable suspension. Naturally, a model of this caliber will blow up most budgets. Additional images are available after the break.

Product Page ($374/Pre-order for Q1 2010)

It looks like EVE serum hypodermic needles throughout the city of Rapture in the game Bioshock, it glows like the serum thanks to LEDs, and it’s even priced similarly to what you would pay at a Circus of Value vending machine—but I wouldn’t go sticking it into your arm thinking that you are going to get any super powers. Maybe a staph infection, but definitely no super powers.

Product Page (£14 or $23/ships in January)

Mounting a t-rex head on your truck really adds a whole new dimension to the “monster truck” theme. The only way it could be better is if it had a Frankenstein, Wolfman or Dracula head hood ornament. Additional animal versions are available after the break.

Product Page ($19)

These sumo robots walk faster and push harder depending on how much electricity you generate with the hand crank. So, it’s not fat, strength and superior technique that wins the day, it’s how fast you can turn that crank.

Product Page ($32)

This little bendable figure has magnets on his hands and feet so he can scale the tin rock wall. While that may be amusing for some, I say glue a few small magnets on your GI Joes and make the rock wall part of their boot camp.

Product Page ($15)

These spit balls expand up to 200x their original size—and they can “slip, slide and bounce until they explode on target.” Described as “slimy science with polymers”, this is supposed to be an educational experience. No, really.

Product Page ($5)

If you are tired of running Sonic around in video games, you can use this racing set to pit him against Tails in a live action race. There is no real Super Sonic action to him, but if you time him getting to the crossover at the same time as Tails, something will go flying across the room. Not quite the same, but as good as it gets.

Product Page (£8.99, about $14.80, available Nov 6)

Kevin Smith pimping for himself with an (in)action figure that does absolutely nothing seems about right. I am sure the fact that there are no movable parts on this doll is just to frustrate those that would love to put him into compromising positions. Minus using some cutting tools it just isn’t going to happen.

Product Page ($12.95, available Jan 2010)