Sorry, I don’t think little strips of toilet paper will stop the bleeding on a severed jugular. But I’ll be dammed if shaving with a butterfly knife straight razor isn’t masculine. In fact, the only way you could get more rugged is with a chainsaw, or maybe burning off that beard with a flamethrower. But I digress.
Fortunately for everyone, this is only a concept.
Congratulations to Adam Brauner and Josh Motto—the lucky winners of Garbage Pail Kids wall and laptop graphics from LTL Prints. Even if you didn’t win, GPK fans should consider picking one up. They look great (I mean, not in a classy way or anything. More like a dorm room, den, a place where visitors don’t normally go kind of way).
Try licking any other light switch in your house. This version melts in your mouth, not the other way around.
Product Page ($10)
Did you get the memo about the T&A reports? It’s just that we are putting a boob note or an ass note on all of our T&A reports now. A boob note if it’s a T report and a butt note if it’s an A. So if you could go ahead and try to remember to do that from now on, that’d be great.
Strap yourself in and feel the G’s that come from playing video games, eating and channel surfing in Alexander Christoff’s Formula One chair. The seat is made from molded fiberglass and features chrome legs and an upholstered adjustable headrest to create the ultimate F1/seat hybrid. However, at this point the chair is only a concept, so for the time being you’ll have to put your dreams of racing the Grand Prix to obesity on hold.
The crack between my car seat and the armrest is like a Bermuda Triangle for cellphones and loose change. The Drop Stop is a flexible wedge that attaches to your seat belt catch in order to fill the gap. It’s one of those brilliant, no-brainer ideas that will probably make a fortune. I mean, it’s either this or get tighter pants—and my boys need to breathe.
Yeah, you can control the temperature of waterbeds too—but the ’70s were a long time ago my friends. Surprisingly, it took this long for someone to develop a practical mattress with temperature control. If you are into the cool side of the pillow, that’s no problem since the mattress has a low temp of 48 degrees Fahrenheit. If you are perpetually chilly at night, crank that thing up to a max of 118 degrees.
They won’t add any high tech functionality to your low tech set of keys, but they will upgrade the fuzziness factor of your pants pocket.
Product Page ($16 for a set of 3 via iPhone Savior via Gearfuse)
If you are a dentist looking for an inexpensive way to digitize and archive x-rays, this little USB-powered device might be just what you need. If you are a patient however, expect more bitching about flossing regularly, because this thing can magnify your flaws up to 50x their normal size.
Product Page ($146)
It’s the 21st century and Simon has stripped his bulky exterior for a far more portable version. Don’t let his diminutive frame fool you though, this keychain Simon light up game will kick your ass just like the original. What’s worse, time and alcohol abuse have dulled your senses.
Product Page ($17)
