If you want to ensure that your daughter follows a path that starts at spoiled little shit and moves on to egomaniacal bitch who’s totally out of touch with reality, then a good starting point would be getting her this bed which resembles Cinderella’s coach and happens to cost as much as a luxury car. It’ll come in handy later when she uses it to mow down anyone who stands in her way or accuses her of having ever ripped a fart that didn’t delight the senses and turn the air into solid gold.
Product Page: (Starts at $47,000)
Are you a restless sleeper? Do you have jacked up feet? If the answer is yes, this sheet and blanket support will ensure that your bedding does not come in contact with your skin. It’s like a little tent for your feet.
Product Page ($13)
You don’t need to be demon possessed to experience an exorcism, you just need lots and lots of money. The “Exorcist Bed” thrashes around on a solid steel 360 degree simulator chassis offering you the ride of your life. You can also choose to add a levitator option which safely and comfortably floats an actor to a height of 5 feet up and down over the bed as it thrashes around. So, finally you can pretend you’re Linda Blair and fulfill all of your exorcism fantasies (minus the puke). A video of the bed in action is available after the break.
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