Remember Screamy from the other day? Apparently there is a flash drive version…and now he is a condom. A screaming condom. Now you might think that a USB flash drive with a condom theme would offer you some additional protection, but this one has no additional security features at all. Additional photos are available after the break.
Everyone is getting hit by the economy of today. It is times like these that you need to really cut back. The Credit Crunch Survival Kit will allow you to be as thrifty as humanly possible. If the mini pint glass and tiny roll of toilet paper don’t save you much money, surely the condom puncture repair patches will. The included luxury die will let chance decide which of life’s extras you will be able to enjoy on any particular day.
Product Page ($6.99)
Toothpick holders in restaurants make sense, but where might a toothpick holder in a condom-shaped case be appropriate? What kind of weirdness is going on there?
Product Page ($4)
I’ve got to hand it to the person that makes these condom pillows by hand—the attention to detail is extraordinary. Not only does it look like a condom wrapper on the outside, the inside features a “happy condom” hand-printed pattern and two pockets—one as a storage area for actual condoms, and the other for an oversized fabric novelty condom. Maybe, in time, she will consider a ribbed version for massaging my back. Hit the jump for a gallery of images.
Any man that is dating a woman less than half his age is both a little creepy and very lucky. He may as well play up the difference and use these Dinosaur Condoms. She will recall dinosaurs from her recent days in high school but will probably not be bright enough to associate this dinosaur with the one she is dating. She also probably won’t notice the writing on the package that says “Product may be used during intercourse although there is no guarantee that it will prevent pregnancy or sexually transmitted diseases“.
Product Page (£2.50, about $3.50)
These condom wrappers will make a good office gift. Not because they will be handy for that crazy Christmas party hook up, but because they each contain some condom paper clips. Nothing will get a rise out of those HR reps more than if they see you pull out one of these packages in the middle of a meeting.
Product Page ($6)
It may just be a conceptual product at this point, but I can’t imagine that there is any self respecting male that wouldn’t feel just a little cooler when he pulls this gun out. The first reason is that it may be the last time you need a condom for a while, the second is that you are armed with a pistol. You just need to be careful, you don’t want to end up taking a bullet because someone mistook what you were pulling from your pocket.
It may be just a little early to think about Christmas, but it is always time to think about ways to get the women to give you a kiss. I consider this product one of wishful thinking. It may be nice if that kiss you get under the mistletoe is not where the action ends, but if you need mistletoe to get a kiss from her then your chances may not be great. But hope springs eternal when it comes to men chasing women.
Product Page ($4.95)
The description on the packaging says it best – “For Schmucks that Won’t Pull Out”. You know, it is all fun and games while you are involved in the situation, but you have to know what to do when the time is right. Take this advice to heart.
Product Page ($6.95)
This isn’t your average lollipop, but it is a great item for that Halloween party. Unwrapping this pop will not give you edible candy, but a black condom. Because if there is a treat you have at your house that you would be willing to share, this would certainly be it.
Product Page ($17.95 pack of 12)
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