If you thought exercise was scary before, take a look at these kettlebells with demon faces. On the plus side, they look cool enough that they can serve as a decorative piece—no need to actually lift them.
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This Skater’s Coach was designed by Tom Demme, a baby boomer who wants to help his generation keep an active lifestyle as they move into the stage of life dominated by AARP, Hoverounds and walk-in bathtubs. It is basically a walker on wheels that you hold onto while rollerblading, allowing you to maintain stability and increase cardiovascular fitness. It also claims to provide the same benefits as running without the high impact on back and knees, as well as greater resistance and muscle training than bike riding. At $599, it’s also a great way to drain your bank account, at least until your next Social Security payment.
Yoga is healthy for the mind and body—but for drug hardcore addicts, “down dog” usually takes place in an alley for cash. Encourage healthier habits during the recovery process with the Plank Pill Yoga mat. The pills on the mat aren’t real, but in their weakened state they will be working up a sweat trying to scoop them up anyway.
Product Page ($95 via bltd)
As if you needed another reminder that you are getting fat, this toilet paper from Japan not only features measuring tape in centimeters for doing gut checks, it also features suggestions for exercises that you can do while sitting on the pot. Even if you are not into diet and exercise, you can show your displeasure loud and clear one wipe at a time.
I am really not sure which is more shocking, the minor jolt someone will get when they grip both handles of the Shocking Wrist Developer or the thought that every squeeze of the device brings these two lovebirds in contact with each other. Just the thought of your exercise including a man and woman going pelvis to pelvis will keep you working out.
Product Page ($4.99)
The one thing better than getting exercise is watching someone else do it. This slightly out of shape man will do sit ups, leg lifts and stomach crunches—and the only effort you need to put in is a push of a button. It doesn’t mean you still can’t feel good about yourself as if you had actually done something.
Product Page ($20)
The use of performance enhancing drugs is a problem in any sport, but we may have to start testing at the office. Could executives be juicing to give themselves the edge in the boardroom with a stronger, more masculine handshake?
Product Page ($6)
The little blue pill will take care of some issues you may have, but it will do nothing to insure you don’t end up home alone on a Saturday night. If you had been working out with this stress ball, then that will not be an issue either.
Product Page ($9.99)
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