lollipops

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Remember caffeinated maple bacon lollipops? For those that haven’t heard, I would be remiss if I didn’t mention that these delectable treats are now available from ThinkGeek.

Concerned that eating lollipops made with real Vermont maple syrup, bacon and the same amount of caffeine as an energy drink might be taking things too far? Don’t worry. This is how God wants us to eat. Or maybe Satan. Either way.

Product Page ($4-$10)

pussy-suckers

A few words of advice to the guys out there…first off, sucking on pussy lollipops probably won’t turn your woman on. Second (and most importantly) these are not to be given out to trick or treaters on Halloween. On the plus side, you could learn a thing or two from them. Hiyo!

Product Page ($15.71 for a dozen)