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Your Christmas tree ornaments don’t have to be all about snowmen and angels. A dinosaur egg that is in the middle of hatching gives the holiday a whole different feeling. Think about how much more fun all of the Christmas specials would be if there were raptors running loose in all of them.
Product Page ($13.99, arriving in Dec)
What could be more dysfunctional than hiding liquor inside a Christmas ornament? If you happen to live with someone with a drinking problem, and your tree smells like booze, you can catch them in the act by covering the tree in bell ornaments. Every time a bell rings, someone is getting loaded.
Product Page ($24)
Covering your tree with boob decorations this Christmas should help lighten the mood when family members who secretly hate each other gather together for awkward Holiday tension. If all goes well, they may be too busy laughing to argue, and you can remember fondly the year when “Nippley, The White Porcelain Tit” saved Christmas.
Product Page: (Availability Unknown)
Tinsel, colored balls and icicles are fine ways to decorate your Christmas tree. But they lack a certain masculinity. What your tree needs is raw American horsepower, and nothing is going to excite a car guy more than a shiny engine from the heyday of American car manufacturing. You have your choice of four different classic car engines, any of which will make you proud to be involved in Christmas tree decorating.
Product Page ($12.95)
This hand-made polymer clay original Nintendo game system is the perfect piece of Christmas tree geekery for any retro gaming fan. And the best part is that you can have the item customized for a different look or to be re-purposed as a figurine, magnet, pin, etc. so you can enjoy it year round.
Product Page ($15)
I hate to be talking about Christmas before the malls have even started advertising for it, but you may want to be getting this ornament before they are out of stock. I consider a good Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwich a staple of life, and if anything deserves a place on my Christmas tree, this certainly qualifies.
Product Page ($6.99)
