There is nothing sexier than a guy with 10lbs of chest pubes right? Even if your chest is smooth and pasty, you will look mighty honcho thanks to this Uber Macho Chest Rug. It’s also great for covering up embarrassing man tits.
Product Page ($7.95)
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Who would ever think that you up to something with a hat this absurd? And the microphone hanging off the side? Real subtle.
This ugly-ass spy hat is touted as the “he first and the only cap or hat in the world that you can lisen to music and record conversation.” It features an MP3 player with 256MB, 512MB, 1GB, 2GB, 4GB of memory, an FM radio, and a 128kbps and 32 KHZ German high sensetive Mini Microphone to record sounds within a 35 foot range.
Product Page ( $18 )
My God…get a load of this tool.
Nose Aerobics works by wearing an ugly-ass pair of glasses that can be adorned with attachments for Nose Hoop, Nose Clackers, Nose Basketball or Nose Puzzle games. Honestly, if there is a better way to look like an idiot, I haven’t seen it.
Product Page ( $9.88 )
Actually, I have no idea what year the Gremlin is in the picture above, but what I do know is that this Vinyl Cologne promises that you can smell like one. Does that turn you on ladies? You’re damn right it does.
Product Page ( $18.99 )
Maybe these fishnet pants and t-shirt are meant to be sexy. If women find them sexy, then I guess I am even more clueless about women than I thought. They would seem more useful if you found yourself in a mosquito infested area rather than surrounded by beautiful women.
Product Page ($24.99 pants, $17.99 t-shirt)
A chicken costume is funny, a Chicken with its Head Cut Off is hilarious. It may be tough walking with those feet and your hands aren’t real useful in those wings, but a little discomfort is a small price to pay to look this awesome.
Product Page ($97.77)
Going bald? Not to worry. This Inconspicuous Toupee will have you back on the top of your game in no time. I mean just look at this guy – he’s the picture of rugged masculinity.
Product Page ( $6.95 )
