Impress your gym buddies when you strut into the locker room sporting this stylish David Hasslelhoff Sports Bag. Each bag measures 15-inches by 11-inches, so you will have plenty of room to carry around your stuff. And if you want to take your David Hasslehoff obsession one absurd step futher, you might want to pick up a matching Hoffmeister Hot Water Bottle.
Product Page (£18.99 or $39.55)
Forget the internet, the iPod, and HD television —a pickle that yodels at the push of a button is surely the product of the century. I don’t know about you, but I wouldn’t want to live in a world where pickles refuse to yodel. Where would we be without it?
Product Page ($12.95)
If you are worried about someone stealing that nice Razor cell phone, throw them off the trail by wrapping it in this nice $100 bill case. Because no thief would be interested in a $100 bill, of course.
And is it just me, or would you spell it Razr? Or is that just nitpicking?
Product Page (12 @ $1 each)
Is this really the answer to not losing things?
In order to help you keep track of things that you typically lose, they sell the Zero Gravity – a spring that you stick to your ceiling and hang items off of. So the way to not lose items is to have shit hanging all over your house? Maybe, maybe not, but it does sound like something that would be fun to play with on a wild weekend.
Product Page (18 €, about $25)
Most USB hubs seem to be trying to get smaller or more convenient. Go a totally different route with the Traffic Light USB Hub. The lights show absolutely no status, they are just able to be turned on. For some reason, it is able to record and play back 10 seconds of audio. Has there been a lot of call for that?
Maybe the most useful feature is that you can clip on a note or two. As a tech device it seems pretty useless, but I do like the look of the traffic light.
Product Page (A$19.95, about $17.50US)
There is nothing sexier than a guy with 10lbs of chest pubes right? Even if your chest is smooth and pasty, you will look mighty honcho thanks to this Uber Macho Chest Rug. It’s also great for covering up embarrassing man tits.
Product Page ($7.95)
My God…get a load of this tool.
Nose Aerobics works by wearing an ugly-ass pair of glasses that can be adorned with attachments for Nose Hoop, Nose Clackers, Nose Basketball or Nose Puzzle games. Honestly, if there is a better way to look like an idiot, I haven’t seen it.
Product Page ( $9.88 )
When is turd humor not funny? Never as far as I am concerned. I am thinking this is a perfect gift for that know-it-all older brother. It will perfectly illustrate the difference in how he sees himself and how others see him.
Product Page (about $20 US)
A wiener dog in a hot dog costume. It wouldn’t have the same effect on a poodle, so I would suggest keeping it to the miniature dogs. The larger dogs would have a better chance of getting revenge on you for making him wear it anyway.
Product Page ($16)
According to the product site, this oral sex snorkel allows you to “breathe normally while giving her a long lustful licking she’ll never forget.” Chances are, it will result in gut wrenching laughter as well – and we all know how big of a turn-on that is. But hey, if you can’t breathe the party will come to a screeching halt anyway. So the next time you are taking a dip at the Y, strap on this oral sex snorkel and get to work son!
Product Page ( $19.95 )
Friends: Asylum• Fosfor Gadgets• Geek Girl Diva • Geeks Are Sexy• Obvious Winner• TechEBlog• Technabob• Uber-Review•
