Unfortunately, I don’t think a road sweeper vacuum and a zamboni vacuum combined could handle your messy desktop. No, for that kind of job, you would probably need the real thing.
Product Page (€13 or $16/Pre-Order for September 2010)
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This mini R2-D2 vacuum may be small, but by the look of your desktop he has a big job ahead of him. When you’re done sucking up crumbs, it’s only fitting that you empty him out into this garbage can.
Product Page ($21/Pre-Order for August via Technabob)
The best way to combat insects is to turn one of their own kind on them. When you tilt this mosquito shaped bug vacuum down and yank on his tail you create suction that sucks the bug into the mosquito body. It also includes a clear viewing area so you can revel in its imprisonment and ignorance of impending doom.
Product Page ($10.95)
Much like a real Zamboni cleans blood and teeth off ice at a Hockey arena, this mini Zamboni vacuum will clean dust and crumbs off the surface of your desk. Finger drive this baby around and you’ll get a much needed mental vacation away from the pressures of the office and indulge in the magical world of a corporate Zamboni operator. When you return to reality, laughs, a denied promotion and a thumbs up from the cleaning crew will be waiting for you.
Product Page: (TBA)
This battery-operated bagel dome keeps your baked goods fresher, longer by creating a vacuum seal at the push of a button. If you are so inclined, you could arm each bagel with one of those toothpick swords and pretend that they are battling it out in the Thunderdome. Two bagels will enter, only one will leave.
Product Page ($40)
The set of Crumb Pet vacuums are all very cute and based on fun little animals. Someone must have had a wild weekend to agree to have a Garbage Truck Vacuum as well. It seems like the most sensible one of all since the amount of crap on your table probably would require a truck to haul it all away. It may not be entirely safe, though, since they make no mention of a beeping sound when it is used in reverse.
Product Page (£5.84, about $8.67)
Freak your guests out by using this handy Toilet Tabletop Vacuum Cleaner to clear the table before dessert. Give them an extra treat by opening the lid to expose the present left inside. This should cut down on the number of people that will still want dessert so you can consider this a money saver.
Product Page (£6.99, about $14)
