If you’re going to binge on whiskey, why not put the source of your drinking on the shot glass itself? All those hours spent playing ancient Atari games without a shred of progress kicking Asteroid ass could drive anyone to drink. If you prefer to drown your gaming sorrows in some other type of liquid, you can always use these.
Product Page: ($16.99 via Technabob)

Pour yourself a pint in one of four classic Atari game glasses: Asteroids, Missile Command, Centipede and Battle Zone. As you slip further into a depressed drunkenness, you can recall the carefree days of your youth spent playing Atari games in your parent’s living room.
Product Page ($40)

That nasty crap that you drink to intoxicate yourself will be perfectly served up in this Polluted Glass. You can feel like an experimenting scientist when you down one radioactive drink after another while others fear even getting near it. Each box contains two glasses so you can share your drinking secrets with a deserving buddy.
Product Page (TBA)

From Fashionably Geek: I have two words for you: burrito-vision. That’s right, you will have the power of the burrito—the ability to look at someone and make them fart uncontrollably. Now that’s a superpower.
Also available in brick and sponge versions, which give you the power to…uh, manipulate walls and give sponge baths from a distance?
Click Here For Brick and Sponge Versions

This 12-inch tall Alice In Wonderland Mad Hatter figure is insanely detailed, insanely dressed and insanely expensive at $200.
Product Page ($200/Pre-Order for April 2010)

If you are going to be drinking beers and trolling for girls, you may as well let them know right up front that the night is going to be a total blur. It may scare a couple off, but this glass could also keep you in touch with a good one.
Product Page ($6)

The purveyor of these shot glasses with painted zipper teeth and an actual zipper attached compare the half open/half closed zipper to the old half empty/half full adage. I think it equally applies to the decision on how many buttons the drinker of all these shots chooses to undo. The more shots that go down, the further the unbuttoning.
Product Page ($39.95)