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It appears that the folks at Scandalous Inventions are planning to expand on their empire of boobie beer bongs to include a few new objects that will surely get college kids and managers at Spencer’s Gifts giddy with excitement. The “Johnson Juicer” (illustrated by Wolverine here) shoots measured shots out of a dual chambered dong bong. Awesome right? But there is more…oh so much more pictured after the break.
There is no reason to do your binge drinking with just a funnel and plastic piece of tubing when you can get a fine female body part on the end of this beer bong. You’ll have people lining up to try this one, whether they really want to pound a full beer or not. And don’t worry ladies, they have a male version for you.
Product Page ($22.95)
If you are unfamiliar with beer tubes, you should know that it is a simple device that uses gravity to dispense your brew quickly. Fast beer pouring means fast drinking and fast drinking means you will probably have a few scenes missing from the Saturday night feature film rolling in your brain. There are plenty of unique beer tubes out there and a few must-have accessories to go along with them—like this siren lid.
The sirens purpose is twofold—It lets your host know that you need that next tube of beer pronto and it warns the other guys in the room that you are going to be the jackass that they will have to punch before the night is out.
Product Page ($19—beer tubes also avaialble)
You have two clearly marked options with the Beer Stein Bong. You can sip or you can hit the “speed hole” when getting drunk fast is a priority. Unlike most beer bongs, there is no tube here to guide the drink into your mouth—so if you have man boobs it might be a good idea to pass on this one. Nobody needs that kind of wet t-shirt contest.
Product Page (no pricing available)
The Flabongo is “the first and only beer bong constructed from a plastic flamingo.” Impressive. If you live in Florida you probably have a potential party bong on every lawn in your neighborhood.
Product Page ($24.98)
